DIY Dismissal
Telling someone to build it themselves instead of engaging with their critique or suggestion. Usually when someone has criticized another's software.
"If you don't like it, make your own."
"Sounds like a great project for you to start."
"Nobody's stopping you from building a better one."
"Cool idea. You should go make it."
Why It's Unproductive
Sets an high bar for participation: you can only have opinions about things you're personally willing to build from scratch. It sounds empowering but works as a conversation-ender, reframing legitimate feedback as entitlement. Often shows up in open source software and product discussions where maintainers feel protective of their work.
The Better Move
Engage with the substance of the critique instead of questioning whether the person has earned the right to make it. You can defend a design choice, explain trade-offs, or even say it's not a priority. Just respond to what was actually said.
Why It's Better
Treats the suggestion as worth discussing on its merits. Keeps the conversation on the idea rather than turning it into a test of who's willing to build what.
Examples
OP: "I wish city-builder games explored alternatives to car-centric design." Antipattern: "If you want your perfect city builder, go ahead and make one. It's easier than ever." Better: "There are some interesting mods for that, but yeah, a game built around it from the start could be really compelling."
OP: "The search in this app is basically unusable once you have more than a few hundred items." Antipattern: "It's open source. Feel free to submit a PR if you think you can do better." Better: "Yeah, it doesn't scale great. There's an open issue about switching to a trie-based index but nobody's picked it up yet."
OP: "Standardized clothing sizes would save everyone a lot of hassle." Antipattern: "If you want to fix it, start your own clothing brand. Put your money where your mouth is." Better: "The problem is that brands use sizing as part of their identity. Any standard would have to get buy-in from companies that benefit from the current mess."